Surely if You See Her Again Id Have to Kill You

You probably heard the saying "If information technology doesn't kill you, it volition brand you stronger". Or if you a fan of Kelly Clarkson, you probably know her song "Stronger", in which the first line of its refrain says, "What doesn't impale you makes yous stronger". The first fourth dimension I heard this phrase is when I was attending a workshop many Valentine ago. The lecturer asks ane of the participants to come up to the front and nowadays something. I forgot what information technology was. All I remember she was hesitated, afraid. So the lecture says something this to her, "don't be scared. Give it a try. It surely won't kill you. If information technology doesn't kill y'all it volition make yous stronger!".

What I sympathize from that incident is that the phrase means when we footstep out of our Comfort Zone and doing something we fear – less the adventure of death – will make u.s.a. stronger, no thing the outcome. It is as applied to the baby too as an developed. The first step of walking for a baby, will atomic number 82 to a stronger foot, which in turn will make them able to walk. Making the first "public speaking" – in school or at work – might scares you to death, but once yous go the hang of information technology, you volition observe it easier the 2nd time, the 3rd time, and then on.

Is this always the example? Does doing something we dread will automatically make us stronger, whatsoever the results were? Sadly, the answer is NO. There are people who later trying to do something they are afraid of, decided non to do it again. Ever. Though they came out of the experience "alive", information technology makes them weaker, not stronger.

I believe there are 2 reasons behind this. First, because the experience itself could be considered a failure. I remember watching a 10-twelvemonth old male child trying to ride a cycle. After an hour of trying and countless falls, he gave upwards. Never want to ride a bike. It only too much for him, I guess.

This is non but a kid issue. Information technology happens to a grown-up also. I heard many tales of professionals who, after got a lot of complaints and criticism in their debut presentation, determine that public presentation is not for them. "I can make a practiced presentation, but I can't deliver it well." That was their alibi.

The aforementioned is truthful for those who put in a leadership position the get-go time. Trying to do their all-time to lead, just to get many resistances from their team. Then they concluded, "I'yard not cut out to exist a leader." Like cases also sometimes happen to people who try to learn swimming, singing, or possibly bungee jumping. Some of them give upwardly later on the commencement or second trial turns bad for them.

The 2nd reason, related to the beginning 1, is because of their PERCEPTION of the experience. The incident may not be a disastrous one, merely they may perceive it equally a full failure. For instance, a young employee, due to its technical competencies, is promoted as the leader of a squad of 5 people. One of them happens to be an older employee. This generation gap creates tension between the ii which got worse over time. During this menstruum, the new team leader does not have any problem with the other 4 team members, as they happen to be around the same age bracket as the leader.

In less than three months the silent conflict culminated in an open, heavy quarrel in broad daylight. Everybody knows virtually information technology and sure enough, everybody talks about it. No wonder if this young leader perceives the incident every bit a full failure in his side considering equally far as he knows, this kind of incident never happens in the company before. What do yous think the ending will be?

Unfortunately, he chose to resign as a leader because he just sees the disharmonize. He did not count the fact that he has a good relationship with the other of his teammates. He also discounts the fact that he manages to keep it absurd in the get-go 2 months. And yep, some impairment has been washed to his reputation, but this is not an unrepairable one. If he tin can amend his relationship with the former chap, it will increment his credibility in front of his team, his colleagues, and even his boss.

Circling dorsum to our current situation. What this has to practise with united states in this pandemic? We tin can get three lessons that we tin apply right now:

  1. Let u.s. believe that we will come out of this situation, alive, well, and stronger. Simply with such confidence in our listen, we tin pass through this situation with a winner's medal in our mitt. Yes, we cannot overlook the fact that in that location are people who pass abroad considering of the covid-19. At the aforementioned time, which one do y'all prefer to be: believe they are going to die and nonetheless manage to alive and tell the story; or, continue to believe they will get well, up to their last breath? The sometime is the pessimist, the zombie, the looser. The latter is the optimist, the winner, the hero.
  2. Let us embrace this state of affairs as an opportunity to abound. Grow in our power to manage our attitude and stress, increase our communication skills, and improve our relationship with people around us and our team. We tin also grow in our self-conviction through doing things ourselves (that we use to enquire others for assist), doing things differently (working from abode push united states of america to re-arrange our lifestyle and habit), or be more confident in doing new things. Cease regretting the past and movement on.
  3. Permit us perceive failure as an opportunity to learn, not the finish of the world. We are prone to neglect when we go out of our comfort zone and larn new things. When we neglect, nosotros effort once more. When we neglect the second fourth dimension, endeavor some other approach. Fail the third time, take a footstep dorsum, evaluate, and restart. Never give up.

Other than those that become stronger and those that get weaker, there is a third kind of people: those who don't experience a thing. Like somebody going out of a burning business firm without a scratch. They just remain the same, while everybody else has managed to adapt to the situation – for meliorate or worse. This is like a train passenger who passes through a very beautiful mural, asleep.

Covid-xix nigh probably will not impale us physically. Merely fearfulness and anxiety may kill usa mentally. Allow us not allow it happen. Let us brand sure that we are not going through it "asleep" but coming out amend. Remember, what does not impale united states – physically or mentally – volition brand us stronger.


 Joshua Siregar – Dale Carnegie Indonesia Senior Trainer

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Source: https://www.dalecarnegie.id/sumberdaya/artikel/articles/what-does-not-kill-you/

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